Keys to a Lasting Marriage

Dear Reader, A lasting marriage depends on the raw material you put into it. There are things you must do to bring about a lasting marriage. To enjoy a lasting marriage, you must be ready to give it all it takes. Come along with me as I give you some of the keys to unlock the blessings of marriage. This Week, I will be teaching on Total Commitment under the topic: Keys to a Lasting Marriage. Marriage is a lifelong partnership between a man and a woman. God’s Word clearly states that marriage is ordained by God to be a lifelong commitment. And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall join to his wife: and they two shall be one flesh (Matthew 19:5). For you to enjoy a lasting marriage, you must be totally committed to it. So many marriages today, suffer a lot of setbacks because of lack of total commitment. You will not suffer again in Jesus’ name! Before I go ahead to show you the importance of commitment in marriage, it is important you have an insight of what commitment is all about. Commitment connotes an engagement or obligation that restricts freedom of action. It also means to bind together. We all know that marriage is a covenant and it involves two parties: God on one hand and the man (and his wife) on the other hand. This means that when you are committed to God, nothing can break your commitment to your spouse and children. Ecclesiastes 4:12 says: A threefold cord is not quickly broken. It is important for us to know that God will always fulfill His own part of the covenant, to be committed to the success of our marriage. The onus now rests on us to fullfil our own part of the covenant to be committed to God, in order to bring us to our expected end in our marriage. This takes us to the three strands in the three-fold cord commitment. Commitment to God Commitment to your marriage begins with your commitment to God. This simply means that, if you are committed to God, you will not have difficulty being committed to your spouse or your family members. Since it is God who instituted the family, it is only reasonable that He has a central part in family life. When we commit ourselves to Christ, Christ commits Himself to us. 2 Timothy 1:12 says: For the which cause I also suffer these things: nevertheless I am not ashamed: for I know whom I have believed, and am persuaded that he is able to keep that which I have committed unto him against that day. Commitment to God begins with Salvation. Not only do we need to commit our souls to Christ at Salvation, we also need to commit ourselves to doing the will of God. Psalm 143:10 says: Teach me to do thy will; for thou art my God: thy spirit is good; lead me into the land of uprightness. A husband and wife who are committed to the Lord Jesus Christ and doing the will of God are walking in the light (1 John 1:7). This brings great stability into marriage and family life. Commitment To Your spouse To accept marriage as a sacred covenant means, first of all, to be willing to make a total commitment of ourselves to our marriage partners. This is why Paul in Ephesians compares marriage to the relationship of Christ with His church (Ephesians 5:25-26). Christ’s commitment to us, the church, is so total that He loved us, while we were yet unfaithful (Romans 5:8) and gave up His life that we may live (Ephesians 5:25).  Christ’s total commitment being with us in life and death, shows us the kind of total commitment upon which Christian marriage is to be founded. It is a commitment based on unrelenting love. It is a love which is “patient and kind; . . . not jealous or boastful; . . . not arrogant or rude; . . . it does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right. It is a love that bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things” (1 Corinthians 13: 4-7). It is this loving commitment which makes Christian marriage a sacred and permanent covenant. A Christian married couple is called to enter intimately into the kind of total commitment existing between Christ and His church. Such a commitment makes possible the blending of two lives into an existential union of marital inter-relationship, where they grow together in loving unity and faithfulness. God created a wife to be a companion, completer, helper and friend. Once you have chosen the woman for your wife, marriage brings you into a lifetime commitment to her. In Proverbs 18:22, the Bible says: Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord. The point is, marriage is a lifetime commitment (Romans 7:2-3) with daily exercise of love (1 Corinthians 13). It is taking time to know your wife and communicate with her (1 Peter 3:7-10). It is building the kind of a relationship together, so that you enjoy being together and after years of marriage you are still ravished with her love (Proverbs 5:18-21). Every marriage must be based on commitment and an unselfish loyalty and concern for the other person.  If you are marrying for what you can get from a person, your marriage will not last.  If you are both marrying for what you can give to the other person, your marriage can be a huge success. The first step in a successful marriage is for both husband and wife to put all their efforts into the relationship—each giving 100%. Your commitment in marriage has to be total, or else, there won’t be any balance. 50% commitment will not be enough to have a long lasting marriage, because marriage is for ever. Before, I conclude this teaching, I will like to conclude with the third strands in the three-fold cord commitment. Commitment to Your Children The final strand in the three-fold cord is a commitment to your children. There is no way to be committed to God and your spouse and you will not be committed to your children. If you fail in any of the three, it will definitely affect the others. As we can see in the case of Eli, he was not committed to the training of his children. We all know the consequences. First, his family was cut off from the priesthood in Israel. Second, his two sons and Eli lost their lives. Thirdly, the whole land of Israel was punished: they lost the Ark of God to their enemies in battle (I Samuel 4:1-11). He failed to be committed to his children in terms of child’s training. You will not fail in Jesus’ name! It is God who gives us power to hold fast to our commitment. Commitment to God begins with Salvation. You get saved by confessing your sins and accepting Jesus as your Saviour and your Lord. If you are ready to be saved, please say this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus, I come to You today. I am a sinner. I cannot help myself. Forgive me of my sins. Cleanse me with Your precious blood. Deliver me from sin and Satan, to serve the Living God. From today, I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Thank You Jesus for saving me! Now, I know I am born again.” If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21). Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org, and conselling@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204. For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant Making Marriage Work Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).